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Posts Tagged ‘Building Healthy Relationships’
Tuesday, September 14th, 2010
Five Ways to Untie the Knots® of an Unexciting
Personal Relationship
Copyright © 2010 by Ty Howard. All rights reserved.
Do you know of a personal relationship that is tied up in boring routines, predictable romance, uneventful weekends, humdrum special days or holidays, separatism, friction, conflict, anger, mediocrity, denial, and stress?
You know what’s worse?
To be tied up in an unexciting personal relationship for so long that you choose to no longer try to re-ignite or re-spark excitement to make it better.
Don’t fret, there are things that you can do to re-ignite and re-spark excitement into your personal relationship, regardless how long you’ve been together. Here are five practical and doable ways for you and your partner to Untie the Knots® and set free new excitement in your personal relationship.
Change the Condition
There are many personal relationships where the lines of open and honest communication are basically non-existent. This puts both partners involved in a position where they are left to assume the condition (state) of the relationship; resulting in, two people becoming tied up in the toxic knots of an unexciting personal relationship.
Recommended Solution: Schedule a – cordial and civil – meeting with your partner this evening where you the two of you can discuss the current condition of your unexciting personal relationship. Let the other person know your sole reason for requesting this meeting is your hope for the two of you to begin the process of “Changing the Condition” of your relationship for the better.
Reach a Fair and Doable Happy Medium
Once your partner arrives to participate in the requested – cordial and civil – meeting to discuss the current condition of your unexciting personal relationship, let him/her know that the ultimate goal is for the two of you to “Reach a Fair and Doable Happy Medium” for the betterment of your relationship.
Recommended Solutions: Here’s where the two of you can agree to commit to practicing at least three or all five of the following relationship resuscitating (reviving) strategies:
1) Acknowledge and stop doing two things that annoy your partner.
2) Create two date nights each month. First date the two of you will do what you want to do, and second date you do what your partner wants to do. The two of you will also agree to not look like the unhappy prisoner while out on any dates together.
3) Twice a year, the two of you schedule somewhere to go – together – for the weekend that is away from home, at least 150 miles away or more.
4) Each partner creates his/her own separate list of ten (10) things you find exciting to do on holidays and specials days (Birthdays, Anniversaries, Valentine’s Day, Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, etc.). Put two signature and date lines on your list for both you and your partner to sign. After each of you has signed one another’s list page, make copies of each list so the two of you will have them for recall and follow-through.
5) In the area of romance, if the two of you aren’t excited or exciting one another in the bedroom, plan for at least one evening each week where the two of you will give your best effort to be romantic towards and with one another. The two of you must agree that you will put the past behind you, be open-minded, and more importantly—be romantic with one another like you truly mean it.
Special Romance Note: If the current state of your unexciting personal relationship is a little challenging to be re-ignited in the romance department, start off by planning for at least one evening every two weeks to get things going. If the current state of your unexciting personal relationship is more severe of a challenge in the romance department, to a point where it has been non-existing for some time, seek a licensed couples counselor or professional therapist for assistance.
Schedule Follow-Up Meetings to Improve
Open and Honest Communication
The – cordial and civil – Untie the Knots® to Make Our Personal Relationship More Exciting meeting has taken place, and you and your partner have reached a “Fair and Doable Happy Medium.” The next step is to “Schedule Follow-Up Meetings to Improve Open and Honest Communication.”
Recommended Solutions: Schedule at least one open and honest follow-up meeting each month. The rules for this meeting are – Each partner is to first share one (1) thing the other person needs to improve or continue working on towards improving, and then share four (4) things you see that your partner is doing well. Lastly, share your open and honest “Unexciting – Exciting Relationship Meter Reading” on a scale of one to five; one being = our relationship is in major trouble, two being = our relationship is showing we have re-igniting and re-sparking potential, three being = our relationship is on an excitement upswing, four being = excitement has made its comeback in our relationship, and five being = Wow! We’ve definitely Untied the Knots® and have full control of the Relationship Excitement Meter.
Strive to Give and Do Your BEST
Many times partners fail again and again when it comes to trying to re-ignite and re-spark excitement in their personal relationship. Why? They are too focused on monitoring the efforts and performance of the other person than the consistent efforts and performance of themselves.
Recommended Solution: When you say that you’re committed to giving your ALL to re-ignite and re-spark the excitement in your personal relationship—”Strive to Give and Do Your BEST.” Make it your primary focus to monitor your consistent efforts and performance, first.
Remember: The person in a relationship who gives their all to give their best—sleeps guilt free at night, if nothing less.
Change Your Position
There are two things human beings have trouble with when it comes to personal relationships that are tied up in toxic knots: 1) Letting go, and 2) Starting over. This is why 98% of couples who find themselves tied up in the toxic knots of an unexciting personal relationship, grow numb to and do nothing about the current condition of their relationship. To them “It’s just complicated,” “It will somehow work its way out for the better,” “This is how my life was meant to be,” “This is the person I got stuck with,” and it becomes an unconscious normal way of living.
Recommended Solution: If you know you have tried-and-tried again to “Change the Condition” of your unexciting personal relationship and nothing positive or better has come from your efforts—then it’s time for you to “Change Your Position” in your unexciting personal relationship. Life is far too short to live in misery, and we know misery loves company. It’s time for you to Untie the Knots® and move on to a better position in life. This will require a new start, and might require being by yourself for a while. Don’t worry—you can do GOOD by yourself too!
Special Change Your Position Note: If your unexcited personal relationship has reached a point where you know you will not be able to teach a content or stubborn person a new and healthier way of loving one another, it’s time to close this chapter in your life and move on. You’re doing this not because you’re giving up—this time it’s because you’re going up! You deserve better and are worthy of having a consistent healthy and exciting personal relationship.
Every personal relationship, regardless of its current state, will always have the following two choices: Choice #1 – Change the Condition, or Choice #2 – Change Your Position. I hope for everyone who is in a personal relationship that is worthwhile and worth sticking with—that you find yourself succeeding time and time again with Choice #1 – Change the Condition.
Remember: The Knots of Life May Test You, Leaving Your Will Feeling Battered and Tried. Don’t Stop! Never Quit! Never Give Up! You May Have Been Delayed, But You’re RARELY Denied!
Go for it—Untie the Knots® of Your Unexciting Personal Relationship, starting TODAY!
About the Author: Ty Howard,
Mr. Untie the Knots®,
Freeing Maximal Business, Performance & Human Potential Daily!
Ty Howard is an internationally recognized authority on personal and relationship development. He is the creator and lead facilitator of the trademarked “Untie the Knots® Personal Performance Process,” and the author of the best-selling book Untie the Knots® That Tie Up Your Life: A Practical Guide to Freeing Yourself from Toxic Habits, Choices, People, and Relationships, as well as dozens of published articles on relationships, healthy habits development, empowerment and peak performance worldwide. For information on his programs and services, visit: http://www.tyhoward.com.
Ty’s Best-Selling Untie the Knots® Book
Book Title: Untie the KnotsTM That Tie Up Your Life:
A Practical Guide to Freeing Yourself From Toxic Habits, Choices, People, and Relationships
Type of Book: Self Help / Psychology / Advice / Empowerment /
Relationships
ISBN: 978-0-9724040-0-6
Pages: 356 Price: $19.95 (US), plus $3.99 S&H
Web Special Price: $15.95, plus $3.99 S&H
(Autographed by Ty Howard)
Publisher: Knots Free Publishing (Baltimore, Maryland)
Click on the Book Cover to Order NOW!
Click Here for MORE Ty Howard Quotations & Sayings
  
Tags: Abusive Relationships, Articles by Ty Howard, Articles for Couples, Articles for Married Couples, Articles on Getting Along with Partner, Articles on Getting Along with Spouse, Articles on Relationships, Breaking Free of Bad Relationships, Breaking free of Toxic Relationships, Building Healthy Relationships, College Relationship Speakers, Consultants on Relationships, Domestice Violence Articles, Experts on Relationships, Healthy Relationships, Helping a Friend in a Bad Relationship, Helping a Friend in a Toxic Relationship, Helping a Friend in an Abusive Relationship, How to Salvage a Relationship, How to Save a Relationship, How to Save Your Marriage, Improving Relationships, Inspiring Relationship Articles, Leaving a Bad Relationship, Making a Relationship More Exciting, Motivational Speakers on Relationships, Personal Relationship Speakers, Positive Relationships, Quotations about Relationships, quotations on toxic relationships, Quotes on Bad Relationships, Quotes on Healthy Relationships, Quotes on Relationships, Reigniting Relationships, Relationship Author, Relationship Authors, Relationship Clinic, Relationship Expert, Relationship Experts, Relationship How To's, Relationship Speakers, Relationship Speakers for Teens, Relationship Speakers for Young Adults, Relationship Strategies, Relationship Tips, Saving a Marriage, Single Again, Single Again Tips, Sparking Up a Relationship, Starting Over, Starting Over After Leaving a Relationship, Strategies for Relationships, Tips for Relationships, Ty Howard Article, Ty Howard Articles, Untie the Knots by Ty Howard, Untying the Knots by Ty Howard, Untying the Knots of a Bad Relationship, Untying the Knots of a Toxic Relationship, Untying the Knots of an Abusive Relationship, Writers on Business Relationships, Writers on Personal Relationships, Writers on Relationships
Posted in Articles, Relationship Articles, Untie the Knots Book, Untie the Knots Books, Untie the Knots Tips | 1 Comment »
Tuesday, August 3rd, 2010
12 Quick Strategies to Build and Maintain
Healthy Relationships at Work
Copyright © 2010 by Ty Howard. All rights reserved.
Healthy work relationships are a must for any business to thrive and succeed in today’s economy. If employees are unhappy with their current work duties or teams, your customers and overall organizational productivity will definitely be impacted by the tension. To keep employee morale and performance moving toward optimal success, you should learn and practice the following twelve strategies that build and maintain healthy relationships at work:
1.) Develop a Positive Attitude.
Avoid sharing negative thoughts, actions, criticisms, and sarcastic snipes. Be less judgmental and accepting of others. A positive attitude is contagious and inspiring to work alongside. Make it your new daily habit to bring a positive attitude to work.
2.) Accept Personal and Cultural Differences.
It is counterproductive to expect and hope for everyone to be like and think like you. Do not place on or address co-workers with assumed cultural biases or stereotypes. When you and a co-worker don’t see eye-to-eye, try looking at things from his or her perspective. You will both be more productive if you recognize the need for cooperation to reach the set goals of the team and organization.
3.) Give Respect to Earn Respect.
Regardless of the situation, try not to lash out or be rude. Be respectful by paying attention, showing interest, listening carefully, and responding appropriately. Be open and honest about your feelings and allow others to do the same, in an amicable and professional way. Remember, respect starts with you and impacts others.
4.) Share Opportunities and Recognition Willingly with
Co-Workers.
Avoid being a spotlight and recognition hog. Never take credit for work or projects you did not do. If you want to be liked by members of your team, try recommending them for opportunities and recognition first. Share the spotlight and recognition with co-workers and you will find yourself improving the trust and appreciation level amongst the entire team.
5.) Avoid Gossiping.
Gossip is one of the top destroyers of healthy work relationships. Do not snoop into or tell another co-worker’s business or private life. If someone tries to invite you into a gossiping party, refuse to take the invitation. Keep away from both the rumor mill and gossiping trap inside your workplace, and you will enjoy the benefit of being looked at as a positive team player.
6.) Resolve Conflicts Early.
When a negative situation arises, do not let it continue to boil. Be prompt, direct, honest and courteous. Develop a plan of action to address the problem professionally with your co-worker. Then work together toward resolving it positively before having to bring it to your manager.
7.) Accentuate the Positives.
Do not jump at every opportunity possible to expose the negativity or incompetency of another co-worker. Be less of a watchdog or a tattletale. Instead, catch co-workers doing good work and tell that to as many people as you can across the organization. Become an Ambassador of Accentuating the Positives.
8.) Set Boundaries.
Avoid developing friendships at work that are too personal and that will sooner or later begin to interfere with your work. Maintain a professional behavior and not a bar or club scene behavior while at work. Developing healthy and professional relationships at work is always a plus. Focus on your priorities at work, and make it your commitment to not end up on the company’s “Wall of Shame” because you crossed the set professional boundaries.
9.) Listen Attentively.
When a co-worker comes into your work area, never be rude to them by not turning around so he or she can talk to your face instead of your back. Do not doddle, send text messages, take calls or answer emails when you’re supposed to be listening attentively. The most effective way to listen to anyone is with both your ears and your eyes. This will allow you to respond appropriately and avoid misunderstandings.
10.) Communicate Effectively and Professionally.
Never refuse to communicate openly and professionally with your co-workers. Do not purposely hold information on how you did something or give partial information with the negative hope that you’ll delay or trip up a teammate on a task or project. Take the time to learn how co-workers on your team prefer to be communicated and interacted with. Make the continuous improvement of your effective communication skills an annual goal for yourself.
11.) Deliver Customer Service with a Smile.
A definitely recipe for poor customer service is frowning, arguing, complaining, being spiteful, and a negative attitude. When you’re unfriendly, rude, sarcastic and mean-spirited at work, you set the team back from achieving service excellence and delivering quality customer service. Common courtesy and professionalism costs you nothing. A sincere smile can be felt through a phone. Become the example and not the excuse within your organization when it comes to delivering quality customer service with a smile.
12.) Do and Complete Your Work.
Being surrounded by clutter, disorganization, and failing to make the expected workload contributions towards the team’s goals reveals your unprofessional and slacker habits. If you find yourself continuously moaning about taking on new projects or are a skilled expert at finding someone who can do a task “better than you”, you are definitely a master at avoiding work. The more work you offload, the more stress and pressure you put on others. It does not require you saying “Yes” to every task, showing your willingness to do and complete your work reflects positively on you and your work ethic. A healthy and positive work ethic will often encourage others to want to work with you, and recommend you for recognition or promotion in the future.
Happy employees are productive employees. All-hands meetings and one-on-one pep-talks alone will not improve toxic work relationships if your employees become frustrated, unhappy, depressed, and feel that they are just plain “workers.” Consider building and maintaining healthy work relationships a very important investment in your company, because it is. By practicing – daily – the above twelve strategies that build and maintain healthy work relationships, you will build stronger work teams, effective lines of communications, higher levels of productivity, award-winning customer service satisfaction experiences, and improved levels of employee morale.
About the Author: Ty Howard is an internationally recognized authority on organizational and managerial practices that optimize employee performance and success. He is the creator and lead facilitator of the trademarked Untie the Knots® Optimal Performance Process, and the author of Untie the Knots®: Improving Habits, Choices, People, Relationships, Performance and Results, as well as dozens of published articles on employee and organizational performance and development worldwide.
For information on his programs and services, visit: http://www.tyhoward.com.
Click Here for MORE Ty Howard Quotations & Sayings
Tags: Accepting People Differences, Avoiding Difficult People, Bad Work Relationships, Baltlimore Maryland, Building Healthy Relationships, Building Healthy Relationships at Work, Building Successful Work Teams, Conflict Resolution Speakers, Customer Service Speakers, DC, DE, Delivering Customer Service with a Smile, Diversity Speakers, Dynamic Motivational Speakers, Effective Communication, Employee Development Articles, Employee Morale Articles, Employee Morale Speakers, Empowerment Speakers, Entertaining Motivational Speakers, Funny Motivational Speakers, Gossiping, Leadership Articles, Listening Skills, Management Development Articles, Motivating Employees, Motivating Employees for the Job, Motivating Employees for Work, NJ, NY, PA, Relationship Speakers, Rumor-Mill, Setting Boundaries, Setting Boundaries at Work, Speakers on Attitude, Speakers on Effective Communication, Speakers on Listening Skills, Speakers on Respect, Speakers on Time Management, Staff Development Articles, Staff Development Speakers, Support Staff Development Articles, Team Building Speakers, Teamwork, Time Management Speakers, Toxic People, Toxic Work Relationships, Virgina, Washington DC, Work Relationships Speakers, Working With Difficult People, WV
Posted in Articles, Business Articles, Empowerment Articles | 1 Comment »
Thursday, March 4th, 2010
If you don’t like something someone was born with, take it up with the creator. Not the created. ~ Ty Howard
Copyright © 2010 by Ty Howard. All Rights Reserved.
Click Here for MORE Ty Howard Quotations & Sayings
About The Author
Ty Howard of http://www.tyhoward.com is one of America’s TOP and in-demand business and motivational speakers on the circuit.
Ty Howard, Mr. Untie the Knots(R), is an internationally respected authority on self-development and business-development. He is a habits consultant, relationship expert, teacher, success coach, and professional development consultant who has dedicated his life to teaching knots-free living and relationship-building to organizations, individuals, and families around the world. Ty is the author of the best-selling book Untie the Knots(TM) That Tie Up Your Life: A Practical Guide to Freeing Yourself from Toxic Habits, Choices, People, and Relationships.
When doing a story on any aspect of Achieving Success, Motivation, Overcoming Life’s Challenges, Employee Morale, Balancing Work & Life, Relationships, Fatherhood, Habit Development or Breaking within People, or Professional or Personal Development…
Contact Ty’s Business Office: Maryland, nationwide by arrangement and via telephone; available for keynote speaking engagements, and radio / television interviews…(also available for last minute radio / television interviews).
Tags: AK, AL, Baltimore Maryland, Breaking Free of Abusive Relationships, Building Healthy Relationships, CA, Celebrity Motivational Speakers, Christian Authors, Christian Motivational Speakers, Christian Writers, CO, CT, DC, DE, Domestic Violence Awareness & Prevention, Dynamic College Motivational Speakers, Empowerment Quotations, FL, GA, HI, IL, KS, KY, LA, MA, ME, MN, NC, NJ, NM, NY, OH, OK, PA, Positive Quotations, Positive Thinking, Quotations on Acceptance, Quotations on Accepting Differences, Quotations on Differences, Quotations on Diversity, Quotations on Kindness, Quotations on Multiculturalism, Relationship Speakers, SC, Speakers on Healthy Relationships, TN, Toxic Relationship Speakers, TX, Ty Howard, Ty Howard Quotations, VA, WA, WI, WV
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